Wow...it has been a day. It is funny how one situation from a day can completely change your attitude and your view from that day. One situation that occurs can either make your day or ruin it. I am not going to allow this to ruin my day (although my day is almost over and it has consumed me a lot today). I have been praying about it, thinking about it and talking about it and now I am going to end with blogging. This blogging thing can be really helpful.
I don't claim, nor have I ever claimed, to know it all or pat myself on the back and give myself the "Mom of the year award." I definitely don't know it all and I feel as though I am really good about admitting when I do something wrong. I am fairly "new" at this whole mothering/parenting thing, in the grand scheme of things, when you think about how long you are a parent for. I rely heavily on my husband for guidance, as well as others who have gone before me in this parenting stage of life whom I look up to and want to follow in their examples. And, I am just going to say it HURTS hard core...to the heart...when someone questions your parenting and basically says they would do it differently. No one parents the same...every child is different. I am even sure when you have multiple children you probably parent them somewhat differently when dealing with the different personalities in your children. Josh and I parent the best we know how for us and for what works with Josiah and the way we parent comes strictly from what we feel the LORD has called of us. Proverbs 22:6 says "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." That is what we strive to do daily with Josiah and any other children we are blessed with. We live in a fallen world...one filled with SIN...I sin, you sin and guess what? our sweet little boy who is in his bed sleeping soundly right now sins. It is just the way it is unfortunately. No one is perfect and nothing I do is perfect, but I try....I wake up every day asking the Lord to guide and direct me in one of my most important jobs in this stage of my life and that is being a mother!!! I may try, but I fail....it is just a known fact because I am sinner saved by the grace of the Lord. I am called, as a mother, to "love my husband and my children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good and obedient (Titus 2:4-5). In loving my child, I discipline him when I feel the need to. By disciplining him I am showing him that I love him. I am doing what the Lord commands. And disciplining for each thing that is done "wrongly" can be different. Whether I feel like he needs a spanking, needs to have some time to think about what he has done or just a good heart-to-heart...that is discipline. The Lord calls us to train our children (some people don't like saying they "train" their children because it sounds like dog training or something but I honestly like the term), . We ARE training them. They come out not knowing how to do anything...however, they are born into a sinful world!!! The Lord also calls us to show them GRACE...The best way we can display the character of God is to show our children (and others) grace and forgiveness...even when you may think they have done the unforgivable. If I hadn't been shown grace throughout my life I would be one very lost woman and so I want to be able to show Josiah grace!!!! Every child has their "thing" that no matter how many times you have 'trained' them not to do it, it just seems to return time and time again. I am 31 years old, and I still do some things time and time again that I shouldn't do. How can you expect anything else from a child when they are learning and growing and try to figure this life thing out?
I pray that we are doing this right. I pray everyday for the Lord's direction...for his strength and guidance. I know this isn't true at all and only Satan putting this in my mind, but sometimes I think to myself that maybe we haven't had any more children yet because I am doing something wrong with the one that God has blessed us with. Again, I KNOW THAT IS ONLY THE DEVIL putting thoughts in my head that are not true at all. I am actually proud of the way we parent...we can always do better, but I am happy with where we are and what we have done so far and pray that we only get better from here.
Not everyone is going to agree with me or even like me, Josh or Josiah for that matter. The only person we have to answer to is the Lord. I feel better already being able to write about this. I still have a headache, but impressed with myself to have the self control to stick to my commitment and not eat dessert after dinner this week....I just think I picked a bad week to start that. LOL
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